HAhAHAHAHA

Now tell me how many of you just started laughing when you saw that??? I did! ^_^ I'm not really sure why it's funny but it just is so I decided to share it with you. Enjoy!

Ambience

If I were this girl how would I be feeling right now? She isn't upset, but she isn't fine either. Ambience. The only way to describe what she must be feeling. Lost, alone, uncaring about her position, merely glad she is no longer where she was. What threatened her there? Was she attacked? Was it someone she knew, who lured her out into a cabin in the woods to harm? As her ambience fades what is she feeling? Did the other have a good reason for what they did? Was it a man, a woman? Did they try to kill or rape her? What happened in the wooded cabin that caused her to run to where she is now? How about we play it this way, and see what she will tell us...

I followed Issac through the woods.

"Where are we headed?" I asked again, realizing before I did he would not answer this time either. He laughed me off.

"The birthday girl must be surprised." The tone of his voice spelled something different to me, what exactly I didn't know, but something all the same.

"Hmm." He chuckled again.

"You're so curious, act your age and wait for your surprise." Again that sense came to me, he's lying, I shook my head violently to banish the thought. There is no reason for him to lie! He stopped abruptly and I bumped into him. "We're here." I glanced over his shoulder at the small cabin in front of us.

"How cool!" I danced around him to the door of the cabin. "Can we go in?" He chuckled, a sound without the warmth it should have held.

"Of course." He pulled a key from his pocket and unlocked the door. "What would be the point otherwise?" I nodded at this reasoning; this is wrong! I shrugged the feeling again, Issac and I grew up together, we were dating, nothing was wrong.

Once inside he sat me down at a table in the living room and told me to wait before leaving. I waited for a minute, two, three, I got up.

"Issac?" I wondered around the small cabin. "Issac, I'm going for a walk." Hearing no answer I left, now I wish I never had, or rather, that I hadn't known.

The wind blew gently outside, the spring air was warm but not to much, it was pleasant. I wondered a few feet from the cabin humming to myself as I went. A scream cut through the air before I had taken four steps. I ducked behind the nearest tree and searched for the source of the sound. Not ten feet away a young woman was crouched on the ground holding her arm which was bleeding heavily as Issac stood before her with a bloody knife.

"Micca, I told you not to make to much noise, my girlfriend is here with me." The girl gave him the most hateful glare she could and hissed.

"Are you gonna kill her too? After all, there was another girl here with me originally!" Issac shoke his head slowly.

"She had to go, I can only have one wife at a time." She threw a fistful of dirt at him.

"You're a fucking sicko!" He growled low in his throat and slammed the knife into her chest. I watched as she died, I had to get out of there. Run.

I spun and took off. What the hell had just happened? Was that really Issac? It couldn't be, it just couldn't.

I ran and ran and didn't slow, I didn't know what had happened, I didn't know where I was; I didn't want to know. I finally stumbled to a tree and held onto it till blood streamed from my hands. That girl was dead, but she had saved my life. I closed my eyes breathing deeply through my nose. Issac. I slid to the ground leaning against the tree; I can't blame him, not if I think back three summers ago...

I opened my apartment door, once again supporting the weight of my bestfriend.
"Issac? We're here." I whispered softly in his ear. He grunted in reply. I led him to the couch and set him down there. I stared at him for a moment. How could she do this to her own son? I ran my eyes over his entire body. A broken arm for sure, a couple of cracked ribs, and he wouldn't be walking on that leg anytime soon...

I opened my eyes again. In the end he had to kill his own mother or be killed by her. Nobody could deal with that I suppose. My thought's went back to the girl, Micca. Still, she didn't deserve that. She did nothing to him. I closed my eyes regaining myself again, no pain, no pleasure, only the void inside me that came from understanding it all. Ambience.

Crumbling Walls

in me i'm tearing
i'm breaking apart
how much of me
still remains in my heart
the walls are still breaking
they aren't standing up
they won't be forever
they'll soon fall apart
so i am still waiting
and when they are gone
i will then join them
with them i'll fall
nothing can keep me
or lock up my heart
i'd rather just
let myself fall apart
so now i am standing
and looking down
and i am just waiting
for these walls to come down
for when they are falling
i'll have to fly
and if i cannot
then at least i can die

Just...talking

I don't actually have any idea why I'm doing this. Writing when I have no real reason. It's some kind of instinct in me to write when there is nothing else to do. This picture is Hogwarts castle but I don't think it looks much like it although it certainly is. I wonder why they designed a castle like Hogwarts; I mean, it seems strange that they didn't just go ahead and design it like any other school, wouldn't that not be as weird? Weren't they TRYING to be low key? Sorry, when I see something that doesn't make sense I obsess over it for the next ten seconds. Not enough time that anyone notices but long enough for me to realize what I'm doing. Aren't I weird? Just in general I mean. *sigh* I guess most people reading this probably don't know me well enough to say but then again I'm sure my friends will end up making a comment on it sometime even if it's not online. What great friends they are. ^_^ You know, most of my friends are quite different from each other. My friends are generally either the perverted smart geek type or the perverted punk/goth/emo type...wait...we're high schoolers so we're all perverted in some way... ^_^ But it's kind of strange, then again, my most homophobic friend found out I was bi and know she has gone from nice sweet friend who needs to be protected to the mean spiteful girl who is defending me half the time; i didn't even know she could change like that so fast. hahahahaha! guess there's always a way to find who your real friends are. I love my friends, all of them, and I'm glad they're standing by me, cause God knows my mom's not.

Save Me

I show you my wrists
The cuts made long scars
I’m hoping you’ll save me
But I know that you won’t

I draw out my knife
Beginning again
Cuts getting deeper
‘Cause I’d hate to live

You’re saying I’m fine
I know that you’re wrong
These cuts that I’m making
Have been here all along

Though you can’t see it
They are bleeding still
Deep in my heart
I swear the pain’s real

I’m hoping you’ll save me
As you walk away
The next time we meet
I’ll be the one in the grave

How to read my color coding

red is ranting
blue is sad
green if informative
rainbow is gay/bi pride
purple is happy
white is a story therefore i cannot reveal the mood

if anything else comes up i'll let you know. thanks guys! ^_^

Congratulations

Happy days
Congratulations
Moving on
And going places
Friendly smiles
From all you see
Only friends
Surrounding thee
Smiling people
Laughing times
So happy
Not a cloud in sight
Staying together
Not growing apart
Speaking with people
Building up hearts
Now we are here
And happily yes
We'll be here tomorrow
At least that's my guess